A 3 Step Formula for Writing Polite Cold DM to Anyone on Social Media.

Want to learn how to write cold DMs?


I wrote really bad DMs.

It embarrasses me to read them now.

For the most part, my DMs had no respect for readers’ time.

They’re like articles. They would go on and on saying trash.

They also sound desperate and more like pitches.

I can only imagine the amount of pain those DMs must have caused the kind people who were unfortunate to receive them.

But the thing is DM is one of the most incredible powers of Social Media.

With good DM skills, you can build invaluable relationships, develop new ideas, make new friends, attract potential clients, and even sell your products and services.


But Writing cold DM is hard.


Just like striking a conversation with a stranger is. Especially when the stranger is obviously on the run.

People are too busy to give a rat ass about a message that’s probably from some insane marketer.

We don’t have time to read whatever we didn’t choose to read.

The number of spam messages floating around the internet today is unbearable. Unsolicited DMs immediately become potential red flags.

But the good news is, the people you write to are real humans. And humans,

We love to be appreciated. We love to be recognized for our hard work. We love to get feedback.

In the end, you’ll realize that beneath the thick layer of our being busy, we honestly want to receive good messages from good people.

So, the real work in writing a perfect cold dm is making it personal, polite, friendly, casual, and straight to the point. For this article, perfect means a DM that’s moderately sane and has some chances of being attended to.

So, here’s a 3-step formula for doing so.

How To Write Cold DM In 3 Simple Steps


1) Introduce Yourself


The first step is to introduce yourself.

It’s common to see people get too creative and overcomplicate their intros.


An intro is an intro and nothing more.

There’s no need to labor how you’re going to write it. You’ve got a name and a thing that you do. Right?

That’s your intro.

The best intros are the ones that are honest and brief.

As simple as:

“My name is Thomas Jefferson. I am a copywriter here at Dixcover Technologies.

“I am Helen Daniels. I am a Digital Marketer, Copywriter, and Digital Strategist.”

No fluffs, No BS.

Here’s a cold DM that raked in over $100 million a year for its creator, Jason Cohen of  WP Engine.

How to write cold DM - Marketing Dorm
Source: Marketing Examples

According to Jason, the email was sent to a total of 40 people on Linkedin and all 40 of them responded. The email was a huge success yet it has the simplest intro I’ve ever seen.

Here’s how Jason started the email:

Hey, I’m the founder of a new WordPress hosting company.

Cut out the hundreds of years of experience you have from your Intro. It makes you sound like a shitting parrot.

A time will come for it. But not now.


2) Commend On What Piqued Your Interest?


Without rambling, what you do next is commend on what piqued your interest about the person you are writing to.

A genuine compliment can get people to smile genuinely and it can open doors for you.

Giving a genuine compliment has nothing to do with your character or honesty. It has nothing to do with whether you believe what you compliment or not. It has everything to do with how you give it.

Many times we have seen truthful compliments taken for flattery. And players and tricksters who make people grin with their art.

Simply, there’s an art to it:

Be specific with your compliment.

I love your hair is not a great compliment. Telling what you love about the hair is.

Don’t commend the way they do their business. Water it down. Commend the hard work they put into bringing the most sought-after speakers on their podcast.

Don’t commend their entire marketing strategies. commend their intelligent mix of science and psychology in their recent marketing video.

Be specific. 

There’s truth in specificity. It tells the people you contact that you know them and that you mean what you said.


3) Ask


Lastly, it’s time to ask for the meeting, the connection, or whatever you want.

Not every DM you send requires an ask. You might want to reach out purely for compliment purposes. That’s fine. You can skip this step.

If your DM requires a response from the other end, you must make your ask as natural and polite as possible. It should contain a clear and simple reason why you want to meet or connect.

If you’d be willing to share a few minutes next week, I’d love to catch up with you to talk about your copywriting successes.

Would you be willing to hop onto my podcast next week? My audience would be thrilled to learn from you.

These aren’t terrific examples. The keyword, however, is to keep it simple.




Writing a DM to a stranger might not be the sexiest thing to do in the world. But it’s a beautiful way to make new friends and attract amazing people into your cycle.

You don’t have to over-decorate your DM with grammar and powerful techniques like sales pitches. 

it’s a conversation, and you should enjoy starting it.

Remember it’s nothing more than a short introduction, a specific compliment about what piqued your interest, and a polite ask.

3 thoughts on “A 3 Step Formula for Writing Polite Cold DM to Anyone on Social Media.”

  1. Pingback: Double Your Email Response Rate With this One Simple Strategy - Marketing Dorm

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